Man-Hating Rant

I’m sorry, but here goes another pathetic rant. Nobody reads this anyway. Anyway, guys are so retarded. They are shallow, conceited, mean, and just plain horrible! And I’m not just some angry girl who got her heart broken and is hating the world now. No, guys have never given me a chance so that they COULD brake my heart. That’s how shallow and horrible they are. It’s taken me years of experience to develop these ideas about men. I didn’t always hate them. I used to believe that men and women weren’t so different and that men were just people too, but oh no. Men are mean. They’re mean. Let me expound a bit. Men are all about outside appearances and physical physical physical. I know the rest of the world already knows this, but I’m just discovering it. I’m just a naïve, trusting soul who looks for the good in people and who believes in the best in people, but now I know better. Men would rather be with an insane girl who looks like a supermodel than be with an average girl with an awesome personality. I have four brothers. I know. They told me themselves that looks are more important than personality to them. It’s so ridiculous. I would think that guys would like to be with someone who understands them, whom they could have an intelligent conversation with, but no. I guess looks are all that matter, which is sad because people can’t control what they look like. Why do people honor and even worship people who are gorgeous? What did they accomplish? All they did was be born, same as any ugly duckling on this earth who was never given anything. It’s so strange the emphasis people put on outside appearances. People think they know what a person is like just by looking at their outside. You just can’t know someone that way. I am the least shallow person in the world. I have been nothing but nice to guys and accepting of all types and I give them chances, but what have they done for me? They’ve never given me a chance. They aren’t even nice to me—they’re not even polite! They don’t even pretend to be nice! They call me ugly to my face and treat me like some repulsive beast that they can’t even bear to look at! I said I’m accepting of all types, but I guess I’m not very accepting of jerks, which is why I don’t like men. Not anymore.

Boys Don't Like Me--Boys Like Cars and Money

So, I’m about to go on a pathetic rant, but seeing as how nobody reads this, I don’t really care, and if by some chance someone does read this, it’s not going to be anybody that knows me so I still don’t care. Anyway, the topic for today is why boys don’t like me. I said it was pathetic.
Here is a little look into my life: I have never had a boyfriend, I've never been kissed, I've never held hands, I have only been on three dates in my life (most people probably wouldn’t even count them as real dates—two high school dances and a blind group date) and I haven’t been on a date in about three years. Oh, and I'm 20 years old. Why don't boys like me, you may ask? Am I some hideous, unlovable wretch? I hope not, but who knows.
Here are some of my theories as to why guys don’t like me:
1. I am a hideous, unlovable wretch.
2. I am shy.
3. I’m too fat.
4. I’m not as busty as Dolly Parton.
5. I’m too much like a man.
6. I have the world’s largest double chin.
7. I look like I’m angry all the time.
8. I seem crazy.
9. I have the nose of an ogre.

In the following paragraphs, I will explain why I have these theories, and I will also refute the ones that I can.
Am I a hideous, unlovable wretch? I hate to sound conceited, but there are girls out there that are uglier than me and they still go on dates and get boyfriends and get married. I have to believe that I’m not too ugly to be loved.
I’m shy, yes, but if a guy wants to get to know me, won’t HE make the effort to talk to ME? Shy girls go out too, so I have to believe that it’s not because I’m shy.
Am I too fat? Well, again, fatter girls go out on dates, and I’m really not that fat, just a little chubby. Besides, weight comes and goes, right? So why does it matter?
My chest. Oh boy. If guys are really too shallow to go out with me because of my chest size, then who wants to be with them anyway?
I’m too much like a man. Let me explain this. I have a medical condition that causes my body to produce excess amounts of testosterone. I’m afraid that guys can somehow sense that, and they are not attracted to me because I’m not woman enough. This point can be refuted, though, because I just received a call from my doctor this week and she said that, because of the medication I have been taking, my hormones are all in balance now, and I am, and I quote, “normal”. P.S. This condition is also what makes me fat, and it makes it very difficult to lose weight. Lucky me.
I have the world’s largest double chin. It’s true. It’s bigger than everyone else’s in my family, even though I’m not the fattest person in my family. I can lose it, but it’ll probably be the last thing to go.
People tell me I look angry all the time. I don’t know how I can help that, unless I plaster a phony smile on my face 24/7, but I don’t think my cheek muscles are up for it. Just know, people of the world, that I’m not angry all the time.
I seem crazy. I don’t know how I do it, but everyone thinks I’m crazy. I swear all I ever do is sit there and say nothing, but then I always get people commenting on how crazy and fun I am. Well, some people think I’m fun, others just think I’m weird. I had a guy say about me once, “Who’s going to date her for the way she thinks?” What is that supposed to mean? I’ve also had people tell me I’m weird and so on and so forth. Well, I’m not really crazy. I’m just a shy, quiet, and quite sane person.
Yeah…my nose isn’t the best, but you know what? It’s my nose. I think I still look pretty dang cute with my ogre nose, and I’d never change it, even if I can afford to someday.
Let me tell you now all of the reasons why guys SHOULD like me. I’m cute, I’m nice, I’m smart, I’m a good person, I’m honest, I have a good sense of humor, I have good taste in music, I’m easy-going, I’m not demanding, I’m not going to call a guy 20 times a day, I’m not going to keep a guy from hanging out with his friends, and I’m just a really awesome person. I am completely confused as to why guys don’t like me. Is it all in my head? Am I making it up? Well, I told you my stats earlier. Besides, you don’t know the half of it. Whenever I make an effort to talk to guys, they always have the same reaction—they don’t look at me (they look down or away), they talk very quietly, they completely act like they don’t want to talk to me and they only talk to me because they have to (like if I ask them a question or something), and if there’s a blonde girl around, they will turn and start talking to her instead of me. Ouch. Oh wait, it gets worse. Some guys are just plain mean to my face. I have had “I hate you and I hope you die” and also “You’re ugly and you wear too much make-up”. Well, there you go. I’m the girl who’s never been anything but rejected. Maybe that’s why I’m kind of against men now. They’ve never given me a reason to like them, so until they do, I’ll just continue hating them. Like they hate me.

Let's Clean Up the Media

What is the deal with all of the filth in movies and on TV? Does America have no pride? Think about it. Most of what other countries know about Americans they learn from American movies. Is that the way we want to be portrayed to the world?
They rate movies according to the content, and allow people to view the movies according to their age, but I'm an adult and I don't want to see that stuff either! Does anyone actually enjoy watching that crap? Really. If I ever hear someone say, "Oh quiet! Here comes the sex scene! It's my favorite," I will seriously worry about that individual. I don't think anyone likes watching that stuff, and if someone does then they seriously need therapy. Imagine yourself sitting in the living room, watching a movie with others, whether they be friends or family, and a sex scene comes on. I think everyone has pretty much the same reaction--they divert their eyes around the room uncomfortably, occasionally checking the TV to see if it's over yet. Nobody likes it. So why is it in pretty much every movie and TV show that come out these days? And that's not the only problem. What about sex jokes and innuendo? They are just horrible, in more ways than one. Not only are they bad as in evil, but they are also bad as in not funny. Anyone can say something totally innocent, and someone can turn it into a sex joke. Very lame. What about swearing? There is swearing all over the place. What's worse is when I watch movies that swear, I find more and more swear words slipping out of my own mouth when I get angry! I don't want to say those words! I don't want those words and phrases stuck in my head, but movies and TV put them there! My point is, let's raise the bar. Let's not be so lenient with our movie ratings and with what's shown on TV. Let's make the PG-13's like how the PG's are now. Let's make everything better, because the people of America do have pride, and they do have morals, and it's about time we show it.

College Education? Why?

Why is a college degree required for so many occupations? College does not make you a better worker, college does not make you a more honest employee, and I can even say that college does not make you smarter. Don't get me wrong; I'm all for being educated. The problem is, nowadays education isn't about being educated. It's about getting letters and pieces of paper and forms saying that you've been there and you've done that.
I'm going to college to be a teacher, but I already know that I could make a good teacher as I am now. In fact, I would make a better teacher than half of the teachers already out there. I have to take education classes, and I'm sad to say it, but most of the people aspiring to be teachers are really idiotic girls who just think little kids are so gosh darn cute! Here are a couple of direct quotes from my fellow classmates: "Does air take up space? I don't think it does" and "Peanutts? Aren't those those things that elephants eat?" These are the people who will educate the future generations, but I can't be a teacher yet because I don't have a little piece of paper to state that I'm "certified". Well, what does it take to be certified? Does it take lots of hard work, studying, and learning? Not necessarily. I could party every night and plagerize and cheat my way through all of my classes, as long as I get the grade in the end. That's all that matters, right? That's the way our society is, anyway. I don't agree with it. Why does someone need a piece of paper to get the job? As far as I'm concerned, that paper means nothing. It doesn't mean that I'm smart, it doesn't mean that I'm honest, and it doesn't mean that I'm a good teacher. It means I paid lots of money and wasted lots of time in order to be deemed "certified" when I was already qualified before I even stepped foot on a college campus.

Sexism and Physical Strength

My theory is, the chief cause for sexism against women throughout history is mainly due to the fact that the average woman has less natural physical strength than the average man. This gives men the ability to control and rule over women, to put it short. The solution? Become a disgustingly strong and manlike female bodybuilder. Then you can go and face the world with no fears. Too bad I'm just so darn lazy. :)

Cleaning

So here are my opinions on how household chores should be done. A very fascinating topic, I know. Let's say Billy cleans the living room and Sally cleans the kitchen, but Sally's jackets and shoes and homework papers are all scattered across the living room couches, coffee table, and floor, and nothing in the room belongs to Billy. Why should Billy have to clean up all of Sally's things? Here is my solution to the problem: Everyone picks up their own things, or the things that were placed there by them, and then everyone cleans up natural messes by taking turns vaccuuming, sweeping, dusting, etc. And voila! The house is cleaned and justice is served.